Are you comfortable saying ‘no’ to people, challenges, and requests, even when you have a good reason? Is it a careful selection process or do top priorities always take the lead?
Making Time In A Busy World By Saying ‘No”?
All over mass media and not so mass (smaller blogs for example) you can read recommendations by successful people about how important it is to say ‘no’ to people, things, commitments, obligations, and appointments; so you would have more time for what really matters: work on your passion, family, rest and relaxation, enjoying small moments and the present.
While I completely agree on the latter causing a good balance between work and play, commitments and rest, I don’t think it’s the absolute model for everyone to follow.
Me for example. All my life I have felt very uncomfortable saying ‘no’. To be honest, uncomfortable isn’t the right expression; perhaps highly anxious, accompanied by an increased heartbeat. Wait, isn’t that a symptom of getting a heart attack? Exactly!
Since I’ve given up going through heart attack symptoms for something that I can control, let’s see what is wrong with saying ‘yes’ then.
‘Yes’ Is A Good Thing
This affirmative word means you want to be there for someone, shows caring, implies a positive attitude, aspiration, willingness, openness, flexibility, empathy.
At the other end, it can also be a sign of an insecure person who is doing something against their will, inferiority. If you’re at this end, then working on saying ‘no’ can definitely be a progression in self-improvement.
I personally like and enjoy saying ‘yes’ and then deliver on those promises. When given a choice (and there’s always one), I’d rather work 3 days straight resulting in satisfying the other side and myself with what has been achieved or take a day-off and help a friend in need; than going to a spa-centre with the acknowledgment that someone/something was needed and required of me and I chose to say ‘no’.
It’s a big struggle if your body and soul tell you one thing and the conventional wisdom another; conventional wisdom in today’s society that is. After trying to see if a shift can be made, I’ve rationalized that saying ‘yes’ actually works for me, even though it frequently causes stress by taking on too much.
By saying ‘yes’:
you’re opening yourself to help/support/love other people
you’re stretching yourself to bonding, learning, finding
And only by saying ‘yes’ will you be able to find out whether it was a good choice. If you said ‘no’ you would never know how it would have turned out otherwise. So ultimately it involves a decent level of curiosity and after all, this is a blog about curiosity.
Are you a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’ person? Remember that there’s no right or wrong answer.