Have you ever felt broken? Irreparable, smashed, damaged? 

That feeling of immense emotional pain when a deeply dug memory in the subconscious resurfaces and requires face to face contact? You turn your head away, but it’s there. You go to another room and it’s there. You go out and meet friends, figuring out the company and social activity will make it go away and switch your attention to something else. Yet when you return to your nest, it’s there to greet you and say “welcome home”.

We’ve all experienced difficult things in life. Nevertheless, we learn to deal with them. Of course, what else can we do? Though we’re the supreme species in the world, we’re imperfectly emotional, irrational and vulnerable beings. The question here is how do we go on? Not by avoiding the problem; rather by looking it in the eye. It’s not easy, but brave and real. Who hasn’t been heart broken? Think of parents, friends, lovers, life partners.

I’ve been there and looked the monster straight in the face, struggled and struggled, sweated like an addict in crisis, but when I’m done it actually means I’m done.

Human ache is what we get. What to do with it? Scream, shout, cry, share, learn from it, grow up, laugh at it, write it down, turn it into creative energy, analyze it….but don’t bury it. Remember that emotions are not things to lock up in drawers, to be forgotten and destroyed by the hands of time. Why forget? Recollect and grow from it. You are what you are because of it. These experiences shape you into a real person with something to look behind. Would you rather turn back and see blank, emptiness, and void?

The world is a mix of colors, shades of white, yellow, red and green, and the grey and black are here to make the others more appreciated. Would you enjoy the purity of white as much if you’ve never seen and experienced the black?

Broken we are and broken we shall be. And say yes to the next opportunity. Don’t turn your back to things and people. You can’t protect yourself. It’s an illusion. Just embrace it and give yourself into it like it’s your very first time. Dive in. If you don’t let go, you’re missing out on experiencing the deepest wonders and heights of existence. In case you end up in the bottomless depths instead, you’ll be able to deal with it, because you’ve already been there before.

Does this sound familiar? Have you felt broken and how did you deal with it? All experiences are more than welcome. 


6 thoughts on “Do You Feel Broken?

  1. What a beautifully written, poignant post. I’ve been broken; I think we all have at one point. It’s unavoidable. I try to keep moving and living. In order to process and not build up anger or resentment, I write. Pray. Talk to someone I trust. Finding things that bring comfort help too. A comfy chair and warm blanket. A cup of coffee. Inspiring music.

    • Thanks Jamie. We all have been, absolutely. Seems you know how to get on; all those little comforting things that give us joy. Though I understand craziness as well; anything that will help you get it out of your system. Thank you for sharing.

  2. This may sound weird, but I find being broken kind of beautiful. It’s powerful and it’s emotional. More than anything, it’s raw and it’s pure. I have felt broken many times in my life and I’m sure I will many more times. Without feeling broken how can we appreciate feeling whole? What is the night without the day? I use the pain I feel from being broken as motivation to be better in all aspects of my life. I use it for creative energy when I’m writing. I use it when I’m working out and want to quit. We should never run from or be ashamed of our pain and emotions. They can drive us to greatness.

    • Well you put it nicely. I absolutely agree that we shouldn’t run from our pain, but use it as a fuel to create things, to become better, to teach others something, or even just “be”. Sometimes it’s hard to push through, but once you do things look completely different. Thanks Kevin for adding a beautiful note to the message.

  3. I just let the pain eat at me. I cry and wallow in my hurt, let it build. I used to talk about what I went through to friends, but no one ever wanted to hear it for long. I learned that, if you’re broken, turning to people for comfort will work at first, but they will eventually get bored, irritated even, and walk away. That always hurt even more, so I keep things to myself now and the resentment builds too. I guess it’s probably the worst way to deal with pain, but life does go on and I don’t know that there’s any more I can do. I just hate that the more broken I feel, the least deserving I think I am of anything good.

    • Thanks for sharing, Valerie. Friends can disappoint us, really, but I guess we have to find a way of dealing with our issues. Believe me, nobody can ever help you (or hurt you for that matter) as much as you can. Try to work out the reasons, the consequences, the solutions and use the broken feelings as a place to grow into a stronger version of yourself. It’s undeniably hard, but so worth it in the end.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s